How to Organize Your Own Themed Group Bike Ride

D.C.'s Seersucker Social Ride

Last weekend, D.C. held it annual Seersucker Social Ride, a procession of bow ties, suspenders, and ironic smugness that ends with ironic lawn sports and twee drinks at a historic mansion across town. But for those who couldn’t make it (pics here, shopping guide here), Portland’s Neighborhood Notes has a guide to planning your own themed group bike ride:

The first step in planning a group bike ride is to come up with a theme and a route. Think of it as an opportunity to show off the places you love and to share your expertise or passion for a certain subject. “I love rides that are just simple and about fun or learning something,” says Bye, who has led over two dozen Museums by Bike rides.

Portland being the hip hamlet that it is, boasts the annual Pedalpalooza, “2+ weeks of bikey fun” with 237 events including tandem bike rides, a Star Wars vs. Star Trek ride, something called the “dead baby ride,” and a “tour de Franzia,” which I assume involves drinking a lot of boxed wine. There’s even a “nekkid ride,” because bike seats aren’t uncomfortable enough with clothes on.

Of course, San Francisco has sported its own popular naked ride for some time. In D.C., the same people who organize the seersucker ride each Spring offer a Tweed ride in the Fall:

Dandies & Quaintrelles (est. 2009), a Washington, DC based social group, organizes and hosts vintage-inspired, stylish events in partnership with and in support of noble causes. D&Q is founded on the ideals of refined style and purposeful living.

Purposeful indeed!


Drinking And Driving

The Shop is a new bar that just opened in Williamsburg, Brooklyn inside a motorcycle garage. Because I really hate having to find parking outside the bar when I sling back a few brews before hitting the road on my bike. When we visited last weekend, the bartender proudly told us that people ride their choppers right through the middle of the crowd during concerts. Definitely one-ups drive-through liquor stores.

Double Ironic T Shirts

I’m starting to see that Kick Starter is a trove of hipster nonsense. And why not — it lets you raise money for any nonsense non-profit idea you dream up during that semester you studied abroad.

This is one of the best and most deliciously hipster nonsensical. It’s an organization that finds used ironic t-shirts in Africa, then rebrands and re-sells them back in the U.S. in order to fund other non-profits in Africa, which are (presumably) doing as important work.

The Project Repat Kickstarter Video from Project Repat on Vimeo.

How this works: This bar mitzvah shirt is from a bar mitzvah I went to. < This used bar mitzvah shirt is from a Goodwill. < This bar mitzvah shirt is from the U.S., but I got it in Africa after Goodwill didn't want it and donated it. < This bar mitzvah shirt is from a non-profit that finds reject Goodwill t-shirts from the U.S. in Africa and brings them back to the U.S.

Next, Chinese hipsters need to come to the U.S. to find the Africa Goodwill shirts and bring them back to China, where they use their thread to make new bar mitzvah shirts. THE CIRCLE OF LIFE.


‘I got the swag and it’s pumping out my ovaries.’

This is Kreayshawn, from “Oaksterdam,” whose biography reads, “Blunt in the left hand. Mic to her mouth. Choppa in my Jordache jeans.” Over a chopped and screwed beat, Kreayshawn tells of how she doesn’t need Gucci jeans because she’s no ordinary girl — she’s “swaggin.'” In the video, she and her fe-mulleted side-kick indeed do a lot of saggin’ circa a broken time machine. It’s the perfect balance of inspired nonsense that makes it impossible to tell if this is a joke or not:

This hella positive review on notes, “I think she has to work a little bit on her rapping, but we live in a climate where your ability to actually rap has little to do with your relevancy.” Indeed.